Despite what you think, your wedding is not about you.

Never mind that you’re the bride. Never mind that without your courageous decision to take the plunge, there would be no wedding. Never mind that you’re the one footing the bill.

Your wedding has absolutely nothing to do with you.

An article in the New York Times recently brought this truism home to me. It concerned whether leaving the “and guest” off the invitation was an okay thing to do. Many invited guests felt they need to bring a partner to a wedding to enjoy the day. Even if they’re not cohabitating, engaged or even dating someone. One woman went so far as to say that any couple older than 35 should cough up the extra $75 for the guest – because, obviously, they’re settled now.

The Times reporter discovered in this case, tradition and etiquette are dictated by financial health.

Call us late bloomers, but I’m not rich, even though I’m closer to 35 than I’d like to admit, and Ed has cleared that hurdle. And I’d like to point out that it’s not just $75; it’s an extra $75 times 50.

I, for one, don’t believe I should have to invite people I’ve never met to my wedding. I will invite spouses, serious relationships, etc. – in short, people I’ve likely seen at some family party at least once.

I am sensitive to the needs of the single guest. I will seat them with like-minded people, spend some time introducing them around and do everything I can to make them comfortable, but inviting their friends? I just can’t afford it.

 I am, however, willing to sell tickets.