My eyes don't focus so well in the mornings (let alone my brain), so I've been toying with the idea of getting the Bible on CD so I can listen to it in the car on the way to work instead of trying to read it when I first wake up.

Unfortunately, I need something lively, bouncy, even, to keep me sharp and focused while I'm driving. The sonorous tones of James Earl Jones toiling through the King James Version are not gonna cut it for me.

For a while, it looked like there were only two options:

1) Drive to work while listening to a boringly-read Bible CD and be spiritually strengthened for the day, but run the risk of waking up with the car half over a median.

2) Keep the car on the road to the tune of such classics as "Hadashi no Cinderella Boy" and "Fever to Future," but miss out on the spiritual equivalent of breakfast.

And then, a miracle happened. One of my favorite American voice actors recorded the Gospel of John in my favorite Bible translation, and a friend of a friend of a friend was kind enough to send it my way.

I tell you, you have not truly experienced the Bible until you've heard Vic Mignogna do the Pharisee voice.