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The Battle of the Binkie

Kathleen | 25 April, 2008 08:38 | (219)

When I was filling out my birthing plan for the hospital, I haughtily demanded that my newborn not be given a pacifier. I didn’t want to start any dependence on a foreign object for infant soothing.

I was, in a word, an idiot.

After the third brutal wake-up call from the overnight nurse throwing on the light and clattering cheerfully into my room with my squalling infant in her bassinet, I conceded. At that point, I didn’t care if they stuck a rutabaga in her mouth. I just wanted more than two consecutive hours of sleep.

As her first year ended, my daughter seemed to be losing interest in her pacifier. She was only using it to fall asleep anyway, and once it fell out in the night, she wasn’t freaking out or anything. But now that she’s in her second year, a surprising and uncomfortable trend has begun: She seems to want it for the majority of her waking hours now. She absolutely will not let me back out of the driveway without her “car binkie.” If she hurts herself in any way (real or imagined), she whimpers “I need my binkie, Mama!” And of course, if she’s tired at all, it is ferreted out from wherever I may have secreted it.

I’m not terribly concerned about it, at this point. She’s not even two and a half yet. Although I never had a pacifier, I certainly sucked my thumb until at least first grade. And based on her genetic recipe, this kid’s gonna need braces no matter what.

There’s a lot of chatter, both pro and con, about the use of pacifiers. The Mayo Clinic Website has this to say:

The pros

For some babies, pacifiers are the key to contentment between feedings. Consider the advantages: § A pacifier may soothe a fussy baby. Some babies are happiest when they're sucking on something. § A pacifier offers temporary distraction. When your baby's hungry, a pacifier may buy you a few minutes to find a comfortable spot to nurse or to prepare a bottle. A pacifier also may come in handy during shots, blood tests or other procedures. § A pacifier may help your baby go to sleep. If your baby has trouble settling down, a pacifier might do the trick. § Pacifiers may help reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). Researchers have found an association between pacifier use during sleep and a reduced risk of SIDS. § Pacifiers are disposable. When it's time to stop using pacifiers, you can throw them away. If your baby prefers to suck on his or her thumb or fingers, it may be more difficult to break the habit.

The cons

Of course, pacifiers have pitfalls as well. Consider the drawbacks: § Early pacifier use may interfere with breast-feeding. Sucking on a breast is different from sucking on a pacifier or bottle. Some babies have trouble learning how to nurse properly if they're given a pacifier too soon. § Your baby may become dependent on the pacifier. If your baby uses a pacifier to sleep, you may face frequent middle-of-the-night crying spells when the pacifier falls out of your baby's mouth. § Pacifier use may increase the risk of middle ear infections. However, rates of middle ear infections are generally lowest from birth to age 6 months — when the risk of SIDS is the highest and your baby may be most interested in a pacifier. § Prolonged pacifier use may lead to dental problems. Normal pacifier use during the first few years of life doesn't cause long-term dental problems. If your child continues to use a pacifier persistently, however, his or her top front teeth may slant out or the upper and lower jaws may be misaligned.

Pacifier do's and don'ts

If you choose to offer your baby a pacifier, keep these tips in mind. § Wait until breast-feeding is well established. Be patient. It may take a few weeks or more to settle into a regular nursing routine. If you're breast-feeding, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends waiting to introduce a pacifier until your baby is 1 month old. § Let your baby set the pace. If your baby's not interested in the pacifier, try again later — or skip it entirely. Don't force the issue. § Choose the one-piece, dishwasher-safe variety. Pacifiers made of two pieces pose a choking hazard if they break. The shape and firmness is up to you — or your baby. § Buy extras. Once you've settled on a favorite pacifier, keep a few identical backups on hand. Many babies refuse a substitute pacifier. § Keep it clean. Before you use a new pacifier, wash it with soap and water. To keep fungus at bay, soak your baby's pacifier in equal parts white vinegar and water for a few minutes a day. Allow the pacifier to air dry thoroughly before returning it to your baby. Resist the temptation to "rinse" the pacifier in your own mouth. You'll only spread more germs to your baby. § Watch for signs of deterioration. Replace pacifiers often. A worn or cracked nipple can tear off and pose a choking hazard. § Use caution with pacifier clips. Never use a string or strap long enough to get caught around your baby's neck. § Let sleeping babies lie. If the pacifier falls out of your baby's mouth while he or she is sleeping, don't pop it back in. § Try other ways to calm your baby. Don't use a pacifier as a first line of defense. Sometimes a change of position or a rocking session may be all that's needed. If your baby is hungry, offer the breast or a bottle. § Know when to pull the plug. Most kids stop using pacifiers on their own between ages 2 and 4. If you're concerned about your child's pacifier use, consult his or her doctor for suggestions.

I haven’t experienced any of the “cons” listed above. She’s never had an ear infection, her teeth look great (so far), and it didn’t seem to affect breastfeeding at all.

I have managed to get her to concede to not using the pacifier in public. I usually just say “let’s leave the car binkie here so we know where it is,” unless I am foolishly, inconsiderately trying to squeeze out one more errand before her naptime.

Unless she weans herself off it beforehand, I don’t think I’ll start any full-scale Project De-Binkify before she’s at least three years old. Parenting.com apparently agrees with this plan. And Parents.com has suggestions when the time is right – that time, by the way, greatly varying depending on child or expert asked. One is a three-day countdown to rounding them up and getting rid of them; another is a gradual phase-out. I also know people who have done the “Binkie Fairy” thing, much like the Tooth Fairy, who shows up and takes pacifiers away to babies who need them.

I don’t know what method I’ll use, or when exactly I’ll decide to undertake that project. I think Project De-Diaperfy will take precedence to the former. But that’s a subject for another blog entry…

Much ado about binkie [Reply]

While some adults fret about this object of pleasure, most children don't spend too much time on the subject. Unless the binkie has gone missing...
If you look around you, most adults do not still carry their binkies around - unless you start obsessing on the possibility that 'binkie replacements' are everywhere... What about those Starbucks cups? Or maybe the cigarettes - how about the all the bubble gum and pencils getting chewed between meetings? And what about.... Oh, sorry, I believe the subject was binkies - stop the worries, just love those kids!

Posted by: RayJ | April 25, 2008, 09:10

binkie con [Reply]

I hate to say this, but my nephew went through the binkie phase from ages 2-3 and unfortunately it had a very negative effect on his speech, even though there was no visible problem with his teeth. The binkie gets in the way just at the time kids should be learning to form their tongue correctly. If you notice her trying to talk with the binkie in her mouth, do try to get rid of it.

Posted by: catnip | April 25, 2008, 23:25

[Reply]

thanks, catnip. and uh oh, yeah, she DOES try to talk with that darn thing in her mouth. but when i say i can't understand her, she's very good about taking it out.

Posted by: Kathleen | April 26, 2008, 10:53

Binkies [Reply]

Four out of four of my kids used binkies. They were able to give them up by the time they were 3 1/2 years old, on average. The older two have perfect teeth, but the younger two (B/G twins) needed palate expanders when they were 4. (At about $500 each....). The dentist insisted the binkies go, but warned me to give them back if they started using the thumb. The twins and I discussed the situation first, and decided to keep the binkies on the dresser at night, in case of "emergencies." It didn't take long.

Posted by: Bethe | April 28, 2008, 12:14

Late to the Binky Gab [Reply]

I never had a binky, and I can't get enough of the sound of my own voice. Also, I have perfect syntax. Coincidence??? Non-sequiter???
OH yeah!!!
Where was I. OK, I remember: don't let your reading overshadow your mommy instincts. I've seen you in action; nobody knows what's best for your kid better than you do, Amiga. Keep up the great work.
PS: I like the "Binky Fairy" best. ;-)

Posted by: DaphneMoon | April 29, 2008, 22:05