Apr162008
Manifesto de Merde: Can the crap
Filed under Uncategorized by andrew wolfe at 7:13 am
Author’s note: Gentle reader, if you are easily offended, often indignant or just plain squeamish, please do us both the favor of skipping past this post.
I’ve recently noticed an unpleasant biological curiosity. How to put it delicately?
Some dogs have two anal orifices.
I kid you not.
There’s one, the sort we all possess, which expels excrement. Then there’s the one (at the other end of the leash), that leaves the stuff where it falls.
The above might be funnier if I were inclined to write as I speak, but this is a community newspaper, and besides, I’m at least as serious as ever.
I have never claimed to behave as a perfect gentleman at all times, or even much of the time. I’m not without sin, and I’m not pitching stones. I fail to understand, though, how anyone could think it’s all right to leave dog’s waste in someone else’s yard or a public park.
Obviously, anyone can do as they wish on their own property. Well off the trail, way out in the woods (I don’t mean Mine Falls; that’s a park) might arguably be okay. It’s good enough for the bears.
As a dog owner myself, I have some sympathy for the predicaments that arise. No one enjoys ambling around with what my friend Steve euphemistically calls a “hand warmer,” and public trash bins are few and far between in these parts (probably for the best, since the few that I’ve found are often overflowing).
Clearly, this is a matter of common decency and individual responsibility; any solution depends on We the People. Some homeowners, I realize, might object to having someone else’s waste in their trash bins, but surely fellow dog owners shouldn’t mind?
Here’s my thought: Like the hobo graffiti of old, owners of both home and dog could paint a little mark on their trash bins… something related to dogs. A paw print, maybe, or a bone. That signal would let neighborhood dog walkers know that it’s okay to deposit bagged waste within.
Myself, I’m going for a paw and crossbones… I’ve always liked that poseur bad boy style. I used masking tape, a utility knife and some leftover spray paint. Here’s a photo:
http://blogs.nashuatelegraph.com/off_track/resource/general/pawspirate.jpg
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